Bound By Love
by NickyM96
Summary: [Castle/Beckett, Beckett/Alexis, Spoilers: Hunt] Fallout from the events in Target/Hunt leaves Alexis in a condition. Can Beckett leave her comfort zone and help her? Will this bring Beckett and Castle closer or drive them apart?
1. Chapter 1

Title: Bound By Love

Author: NickyM96

Rating: K+

Summary: Fallout from the events in Target/Hunt leaves Alexis in a condition. Can Beckett leave her comfort zone and help her? Will this bring Beckett and Castle closer or drive them apart?

Spoilers: Hunt. This takes place immediately following that episode.

Disclaimer: These characters don't belong to me. I'm just borrowing them for my own entertainment purpose and will return them for the next user when done.

A/N - I was super excited to write this story. I'm a big fan of what could be between Beckett and Alexis. But Squab/Quail episode kind of killed my muse. I'm getting over it and coming back to myself. But slowly. I'm afraid this story was a casualty. I'm not quite as enthused about the ending, so anything after Chapter 4 might be kind of blah. So keep that in mind ...

* * *

Chapter 1

There are certain first moments in life that every man lives for. Holding his first paycheck. Holding his first love. Holding his first child. Richard Castle has accomplished all those moments with pride. But the moment unfolding before him now is easily about to make it to very near the top of that list of important firsts.

The laughter that bubbles up across the room makes Castle smile into his glass of wine. He's heard that laughter before from his daughter, his mother, and his girlfriend, Kate Beckett. But never all at the same time. Never with Alexis lounging comfortably against Beckett, a gleam of adoration in both women's eyes. Never because his mother has just given them both good night kisses and tickles before heading off to bed. This is a moment he has to remember. This is the first moment they've felt like a family.

"Good night, Mother," Castle calls out, rising to accept Martha's hug. He notices she holds on a few extra seconds. It doesn't bother him because he feels the need to hold on a bit longer himself. Things in Paris had gotten a lot more dangerous than he'll ever admit to the woman, but somehow she can tell.

"I love you, my boy," she whispers before quickly dashing up the stairs to avoid her tears being seen.

"I think I'll go up, too," Alexis says, accepting one last hug from Beckett before running to her dad. "Thanks again for saving me."

It still chokes him up to think about what had happened, and what could have happened, so he says nothing. He just hugs her tightly before sending her on her way.

"You okay?" Beckett asks, giving him a few minutes to compose himself.

"I don't think I'll ever be okay again after something like that," he admits honestly. "Kate ... it was bad. It was close. Too close. We could have died."

Beckett tries to hide her own pain and fear, but can't quite hold back a tear that escapes.

"Can you tell me about it?"

"No yet," he shakes his head, moving to the couch to sit next to her.

She crawls in his lap and curls into his chest, breathing in the scent of him.

"I'm so happy you're okay, that you're home," she whispers. "I'm so happy you brought Alexis home."

"I wasn't coming back without her."

A jolt of fear goes through her at that thought.

"That terrifies me," she admits. "The thought of losing you. Of losing her. So I understand you doing anything to get her back, even if it meant your life."

"I love you, Kate. But she's my daughter," he says, still feeling the need to explain to her. "And at times, I have to love her more and put her first."

"Shhh," Beckett says, placing a finger on his lips. "I told you, I understand. You never have to explain your love for your daughter to me."

She replaces her finger with her lips, giving him a gentle kiss.

"It's one of the things I love about you."

Another kiss follows, this one deeper. This one, he actively participates in. Just when his hands start to roam under her shirt, she pulls herself away and stands up. She can only laugh at the look of utter desperation on his face when he reaches out for her.

"Meet me in the bedroom," she practically purrs. "It won't do for us to get caught by Martha or Alexis. I have big plans for you tonight._ All_ night."

He watches, mesmerized, as she slinks off towards his bedroom. When she disappears from sight, he jumps to action. He all but throws the used dishes and wine glasses in the sink. He checks the locks on the front door next and makes a mental note to do something about the fire in the fireplace later. It would take too long to deal with it now and he's all out of patience. He's been days without Kate Beckett and he's ready to see what kind of welcome home she has planned for him.

By the time he gets to the bedroom, he's already started taking off his clothes. He frowns at the empty room, wondering where she could have gone. But the sounds of water running lets him know where to find her. He continues stripping down, stepping towards the bathroom.

"Don't come in yet," she says, suddenly stepping out of bathroom. She puts a hand on his chest to stop him. "I'm still setting things up."

He peeks in and sees that she's just turned off the water in the tub, the layer of bubbles just starting to skim the top. His eyes light at the thought of those bubbles barely covering her body. He wants to be patient, but ...

"It's been so long," he whines, bringing an amused smile to her lips.

"Don't be a baby, Castle. I'll make the wait worth your while," she assures him.

She pushes him towards the bed and makes him sit on the edge. She climbs onto his lap, straddling either side of his thighs with her own. He reaches up to pull off her shirt, but she lightly smacks him on the hand.

"Not yet," she teasingly scolds him, a seductive grin on her face. "Remember ... patience."

"Sorry, Baby," he says, surprising her when he flips her onto the bed. Now he's the one standing over her. "I'm all out of patience."

He reaches down and rips her shirt open, buttons flying across the room and skittering across the floor. Her slow simmering arousal slams to full boil as he attacks her mouth with a crushing kiss. Finding that she's also out of patience, Beckett reaches to unfasten his pants. She just manages to get the zipper down when they're interrupted by the door flying open.

"Richard!"

Equal parts pain, confusion, and irritation snap on his face when he realizes his mother is standing in his doorway.

"It's Alexis," she screams before he can complain. She turns and runs out the room before he can question her.

In a flash, he's out the door behind his mother. Beckett takes the time to grab her phone and her gun, not knowing what the danger is, but wanting to be prepared.

"Alexis, wake up, Baby. Alexis!"

Castle's panicked voice and a quick assessment of the situation has Beckett calling for an ambulance. After finishing the call, she goes over to Martha.

"What happened? What's going on?"

"I came to check on her," Martha cries. "I just needed to be sure she was okay. When I got in here, she seemed like she was in a daze. I couldn't shake her out of it. Then, she just passed out. Now, she won't wake up. Katherine, why won't she wake up?"

"It's going to be okay," Beckett says, grabbing the older woman's hands. "I called the EMTs. They should be here any minute. Can you go make sure they can get in?"

After Martha is out of the way, Beckett goes to Castle.

"Castle, stop!" she orders the man when she notices him shaking Alexis harder and harder. She pulls his hands away and places one on the girl's chest. "She's breathing. Feel that?"

"She's breathing," he repeats, nodding his head. "She's okay. She's just sleeping, right?"

"I don't know," Beckett shrugs helplessly. "But she's breathing right now. That's all that matters. The ambulance is on its way."

"I didn't think to call," he sobs. "Why won't she wake up?"

"Shhh," Beckett says, pulling him into her arms. "Let's just get her to the hospital. Let's wait and see what the doctors say."

The longest five minutes pass before they hear the front door opening and the paramedics running up the stairs. They load Alexis onto a stretcher and carry her out the penthouse, Castle right behind them. The two women find themselves alone again, standing underneath the 'Welcome Home' sign they hung earlier. This time, fear and worry fill their hearts instead of joy and relief. This time, they have no idea when, or if, they'll have reason to rejoice again.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

They pass the long night waiting on the doctors to run their tests. So far, nothing explains the mysterious condition Alexis has suddenly fallen into. Fortunately, the staff allowed all three of them to say in the room with Alexis. Beckett feared she'd have to resort to using her badge if they tried to kick them out.

Beckett finally convinced Castle to at least sit and rest around three in the morning. His pacing the room was starting to make her dizzy. They both dozed off for a couple of hours, only to be awakened by the nurse coming in to check on Alexis.

"How is she?" Castle asks, his voice rusty from fatigue.

"About the same as before. I'm sorry, Sir." The nurse frowns sadly at Castle and continues making notes of Alexis' vital signs. "The doctor will be in to speak with you shortly."

The nurse finishes her business and leaves the room, leaving a devastated Castle behind.

"What is wrong with her? Why can't they figure it out?" he impatiently asks. "I'm going to call in a specialist. I can't take this waiting."

"Just wait, Castle," Beckett says, stopping him from making a call. "Calling in a specialist right now will only make Alexis to have to go through all those tests again. You don't want that for her, do you?"

Beckett subconsciously rubs the spot on her chest where her gunshot wound resides. She knows all about hospitals and doctors and tests. Nobody wants to go through that if they don't have to.

"You're right," Castle sighs, putting his phone back in his pocket. "As usual, you're right. What would I do without you? I wouldn't get through this if you weren't here for me."

"We're here for each other," she says with a small smile. "I'm worried too."

Castle looks closer at her and recognizes the raw, agonizing fear in Beckett's eyes too. She really is worried. Strangely, it comforts him to know she's feeling what he's feeling. He pulls her into his arms and holds tightly.

"We're not going to lose her," he promises. He leans over and kisses away the one tear that made its way down her cheek.

The door opens and they both look up, expecting the doctor. But it's Martha coming in with a paper bag in one hand and a tray of coffee in the other.

"Good, you two are awake. I brought muffins and coffee," she says cheerfully. "We have to keep our strength up for when our girl awakens."

"You sound so sure, Mother."

Martha's smile falters slightly when she looks at her unresponsive granddaughter.

"I have to be sure," she says quietly, pressing a kiss to the girl's forehead. "She has to be okay. We have to believe she's going to be okay."

Martha looks to both of them, daring either of them to defy her faith. Beckett can only smile at the woman. Whatever this is that has Alexis down for the count doesn't stand a chance against the formidable woman.

They're just finishing with breakfast when the doctor finally arrive.

"Mr. Castle, I have what I think is some good news about your daughter."

Castle jumps to his feet, pulling Beckett with him. His hand is firmly attached to hers, so she has no choice but to go where he goes.

"Have you figured out what this is?"

"Her brain scans show some swelling around a foreign object," the doctor starts.

"Foreign object? Like a tumor? Is this cancer?" Castle panics, jumping to the worst possible conclusion he can imagine.

"No, Mr. Castle." The doctor turns on a screen and slides an image onto it so they all can see. "Some sort of projectile or shrapnel, possibly from the explosion you mentioned. Maybe from the gunshots around you. It's likely pieces of anything broke off as the bullets struck them and became embedded in your daughter's head. Fortunately, it's a simple matter of going in surgically to remove the object. Once the swelling goes down, she should wake up."

"So this isn't major surgery?" Beckett clarifies, her hand again going to her chest.

"Minimally invasive," the doctor assures them. "The object isn't embedded very far. If it wasn't for the swelling, it may have even ejected itself eventually. We just don't want to risk it migrating further into her brain and causing more problems."

The doctor explains the situation to Castle for another 20 minutes before he's convinced to agree to the surgery. The medical staff prepare Alexis for the surgery and wheels her to the OR. Beckett figures that's as good as time as any to go into Central for a couple hours and make arrangements for her and Castle to be gone for awhile.

She manages to make it to her desk before being stopped by Ryan and Esposito.

"Yo, Beckett," Esposito calls to her. "Where you been, girl?"

"We caught a case," Ryan explains. "Captain Gates was just ..."

"Is this something you guys can do without me?" Beckett interrupts. She gives them an apologetic look. "Something's come up and I'm not sure how available I'm going to be."

"What's wrong?" Ryan asks, concern on his face. "I thought Castle and Alexis were back from Paris. But you don't look happy."

"Alexis is in the hospital. She's in surgery right now." Beckett looks down at her watch to see how long she's been away. "I need to get back to Castle, but I wanted to at least check in with you guys first. I wanted you to know what was going on. Plus, I'm going to have to try to figure out how to explain this to the captain."

"Explain what to me?"

Beckett turns to find Captain Gates standing right behind her. Ryan and Esposito shoot Beckett a look of apology and sympathy before turning and walking back to their desks. They try to appear busy so their eavesdropping can go unnoticed. They're sorely disappointed when Captain Gates leads Beckett into her office and closes the door.

"Detective Beckett. What is this about?"

Beckett declines the offer to take a seat and paces across the floor instead. She's not sure where to begin and she's definitely not sure how much she wants to explain to her captain about the level of her involvement with her partner. Civilian or not, they're still partners and Beckett is afraid all that is about to end.

"Sir, as you know, Castle and his daughter returned home from Paris yesterday."

"Yes!" Gates says excitedly, a huge smile on her face. "How is she? How is Mr. Castle? It's amazing how he was able to find her."

"That's actually why I'm here. I need some time off. I'm sure I have some personal days. I'm not sure how much time I'll need."

Gates rises from behind her desk and walks around to sit on it instead.

"Care to explain why?"

"It's Alexis, Sir. She's … sick, or something. She's in surgery as we speak."

"Oh my goodness," Gates gasps. "That poor child. First she's kidnapped and now this."

Beckett can't help but be surprised by the look of genuine worry on her captain's face.

"The doctors think she's going to be all right after the surgery. But Castle is worried."

"Of course he's worried," Gates agrees. "I'm sure you're both worried. There's nothing like a sick child to make a parent feel so helpless. You take all the time you need, Detective Beckett. This job is just a job. Family comes first. You go take care of your baby."

"Mine, Sir? You mean Castle's, right?" Beckett is confused at what the captain is implying.

"I know what I said, Detective Beckett. Kate," she amends to sound more personal. "Look, we're both intelligent women. We both know what's going on with you and Mr. Castle. If Montgomery had no reason to complain about you two, then I don't either. The work gets done and you two keep the private stuff private. No need to fix what isn't broken."

"You have it wrong," Beckett tries to correct her. "Yes, Castle and I are together. But it's just been this past year. We weren't together when Montgomery was around or for your first year here, for that matter."

"Sure," Gates says sarcastically, chuckling a bit at Beckett's story. She obviously doesn't believe her.

"And Alexis isn't mine."

At that statement, the humor leaves. Gates gives her a curious look before reaching across her desk for a picture frame. She hands the picture to Beckett and lets her look at it for a moment.

"That's my oldest, Carla," Gates explains. "She was part of the package when I married her father. But she's no less my child than the ones I gave birth to."

"I don't understand, Sir." Beckett hands back the photo, a confused look on her face.

"Kate, I saw you when Alexis was missing. I saw the pain you tried to hide from everyone. For goodness sake, I saw you in that interrogation room when you were trying to get information out of the suspect's girlfriend. You kicked her across the room! I didn't stop you because I know what a mother would do to get to her child. I let you do what I knew you had to do. What I would've done."

"I'm not her mother," Beckett says, almost sadly and with regret. "She has a mother. She doesn't need me."

"Maybe not," Gates shrugs. "But did you stop to think that maybe you need her?"

The thought stays with Beckett all the way back to the hospital. Is the captain right? Is she the one who needs Alexis? She never thought of it that way. She's tried to stay from between Alexis and Castle. In a way, she may have been so resistant to the idea of forming a romantic relationship with Castle until the girl had fully grown up. But what about now? Alexis is going to need Castle now more than ever. Beckett wonders if she should step back again and put her feelings for Castle aside for Alexis' sake. More importantly, she wonders if she can. Thoughts of being apart from Castle cause her physical pain. She she decides to put the thought away, to cross that bridge when she gets to it, so to speak.

By the time she gets back to the hospital, Alexis is out of surgery and back in her room. Castle is by her bedside, willing her to wake up.

"The doctor says talking to her might help her come around," he explains sheepishly. "So I've just been talking nonstop. I'm not even sure what I've been saying."

He yawns widely and rubs his tired yes.

"You're exhausted," Beckett notes. "Why don't you go take a walk and stretch your legs. Maybe go to the cafeteria for some food. You've got to get out of this room."

Castle looks longingly at the door, then back down at the still unconscious Alexis.

"I don't want to leave her," he finally says.

"She won't be alone, Castle. I'll be right here with her," Beckett promises. "I won't leave her alone."

Despite her reservations about Alexis needing her, Beckett can see that Castle definitely needs her. He's going to collapse from fear, grief and exhaustion if she doesn't take care of him. Taking care of Alexis is her way of taking care of Alexis' father. Maybe this is what Gates was talking about. This is something Beckett is confident she can do. This is something Beckett knows she has to do.

"Go," Beckett encourages him, taking his hand and pulling him towards the door. "Alexis and I will both be here when you get back."

She gives him a light kiss and pushes him out the door. Turning to look at Alexis, a brief moment of uncertainty fills her mind. But she pushes it aside. Castle needs her to be here for Alexis. So that's what she's going to do. She goes to sit in the seat vacated by Castle and just stares at the girl.

"Okay, Alexis. It's just you and me now. I know you may not be my biggest fan, but I really do care about you. And I care about your father. He's worried about you, Kid. So get better, okay? Get better for him."

She tentatively reaches for Alexis' hand and holds it gently in her own. Seeing the girl so still and helpless, Beckett can't help but feel protective of her. Her heart clenches and Beckett realizes that Gates was actually right. The girl might not need her, but she certainly needs this little girl. Her heart is flooded with the love she's been trying to deny for whatever reasons. None of those reasons matter anymore. This child, her child now, needs all the love she can get to get through this. And Beckett is determined not to let her down.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

* * *

Castle admits that the short break is just what he needed. As usual, Beckett was right. He smiles at how well she knows him.

On his way back into Alexis' room, he's surprised to see his mother sitting in the hall.

"Mother? Why are you out here?" he asks, sitting in the chair next to her.

Martha just smiles and nods towards the closed door.

"I didn't want to interrupt. You know how private Katherine is about her feelings. It took years for her to get used to me hugging her. I just wanted to give her this time with Alexis. She needed it. They both do."

Castle gives her a confused look.

"What do you mean by that? Beckett and Alexis have always gotten along just fine."

"Oh, Richard," Martha sighs, shaking her head. For such a skilled, insightful writer, her son never ceases to amaze her with how oblivious he is about the women in his life.

"Seriously, Mother. I don't understand what you're trying to say. I never knew there were problems between Alexis and Beckett. Why wouldn't either of them tell me?"

"I wouldn't say there were 'problems' between them. They were ... polite," Martha finally says after a few seconds to find the right word. "They got along for your sake. But I sensed a distance. They both had their guards up."

Castle thinks about how things have been the past year he's been dating Beckett and wonders if what his mother is saying could be true.

"Beckett _was_ worried what Alexis thought when she found out we'd starting dating," he remembers. "It was actually the first question she asked when I told her Alexis knew. She was nervous."

"I think this is a confusing time for Katherine. Becoming a mother figure to a girl who's about the same age she was when she lost her own mother," Martha continues. "But it's so clear she adores Alexis. Richard, you should have seen her when you and Alexis were in Paris. That woman was a nervous wreck, not only worrying about you, but about Alexis too. She loves her more than she realizes."

Still thrown by the conversation, Castle walks to the door and peeks through the window. And it seems like his mother is right. Beckett is sitting protectively next to Alexis, guarding his daughter like a mother bear guards her cub. The sight of them together like that touches his heart. And once again, he can't help but feel like they're becoming a family. He'll have to think about taking the next step to making this family thing permanent. He never thought Beckett was ready before. But now, things seemed to have changed. Maybe she's ready for the happily ever after. With one last glance, he goes back over to his mother.

"How about I treat you to dinner in the oh so lovely cafeteria downstairs. I hear they have an excellent chicken salad."

She just smiles and nods, standing to take his hand. Castle has nothing to worry about with Beckett standing guard. His baby is in good hands.

* * *

It's been a long couple days, between the kidnapping and now this, and the stress of it all begins to catch up with Beckett. Fatigue starts to hit her pretty hard. She lays her head on the bed next to where she's holding Alexis' hand. Without really thinking, she starts to hum one of the songs her own mother used to sing to her when she was sick. She's just starting to drift off to sleep when she feels a tug on her hand.

Sitting up, she looks around to see if Castle has returned. But she's still alone with just Alexis. She starts humming her song again, this time adding words on her favorite part. But the singing also halts when she notices Alexis start to move her eyes. Beckett can only gasp as the younger woman blinks owlishly.

"Don't stop," Alexis croaks slowly. "It's a pretty song."

"Alexis? Sweetie, can you hear me?"

Alexis just moans, but it's more than she's done since she first collapsed. Beckett reaches for the nurse's call button to get someone in there immediately. Alexis looks as if she's about to drift off again.

"No, Honey. Don't go back to sleep. You've been asleep for way too long."

Alexis turns a glazed, confused stare towards Beckett.

"I was sleep?"

"You're going to be okay now," Beckett smiles, squeezing her hand. "The doctor is going to come check you out, but I'm sure you're going to be just fine."

The nurse comes in and goes straight to her patient, a big smile on her face.

"Well, well, well. Look who's awake now. How are you feeling, Darlin'?"

Beckett can't help but smile along with the cheerful woman. She doesn't remember having such a personable nurse when she was in the hospital after her shooting. But she's glad the kind woman is here for Alexis.

"She just woke up," Beckett explains.

"That's a good sign." The nurse busies herself with a quick exam, jotting down all the relevant vital signs. "But we knew the good doctor would fix you right as rain, Sugar. And right as rain you are. I'm just going to go get the doctor. He'll check you over and I'm sure you'll be out of here in no time. I bet you'll be glad to get her home, Mom."

Beckett is so surprised at the nurse's assumption she's Alexis' mother that she doesn't say anything until the woman is halfway to the door.

"No, I'm not … " Beckett tries to correct her, but the sound of the closing interrupts her. It's too late. The woman is gone.

"Sorry about that," Beckett blushes. "I guess she saw me in here with you and thought ..."

Again Beckett is interrupted, this time by the opening of the door and Castle rushing inside.

"Why didn't you tell me she was awake?" he asks, out of breath from the mad dash into the room and also from excitement. "I just ran into the nurse outside and she told me."

"She just woke up, I swear," Beckett smiles. But her smile fades into confusion when she feels Alexis grab her hand, almost as if in fear.

"Is this the doctor?" Alexis asks shyly, causing everyone in the room to stop in their tracks.

Beckett and Castle give panicked looks to each other before staring at Alexis as if she had a third eye.

"Mom? Who is this? What's going on?" Alexis sees the panic on their faces and starts to get upset too.

Beckett jumps out her seat and steps back, not knowing what to do. She's relieved when Castle seems to gather his wits and manages to paste a smile on his face.

"Alexis, Baby. It's me. It's your dad. Don't you know me?"

She frowns, and turns to Beckett for verification.

"Mom?"

"That's not your mom," Castle answers her. "But she is a friend."

"But …" Tears and confusion fill Alexis' eyes and Beckett can't stand it any longer. She moves to take her place back at the girl's side.

"Hey, calm down. It's okay," Beckett soothes her. "Remember what I said to you when you woke up? You're going to be fine."

Alexis grabs her hand like it's a lifeline. She squeezes her eyes shut, forcing the tears to spill down her cheeks.

"Why don't I feel okay?" she cries.

"Alexis look at me," Beckett says firmly, having to get her attention. She looks her squarely in the eyes. "What did I tell you when you woke up? Didn't I say everything was going to be okay? Trust me, okay? Everything is going to be fine. You're going to be fine. We're going to get through this together."

"You won't leave me?"

"I promise," Beckett assures her, pressing a kiss on the girl's forehead. "Your dad, either. We're both here for you."

Taking her cue from Beckett, Alexis glances in Castle's direction and tentatively reaches her hand out for him.

The doctor picks that moment to come in.

"How is my star patient?" he asks, not noticing the awkwardness in the room.

"Having some confusion," Castle explains, causing the doctor's brow to furrow.

"Hmm, let's check you out then, Miss Castle. If I can have everyone else clear out …"

"No!" Alexis nearly yells, her grip on Beckett's hand tightening. "Can my mo- … I mean, can_ she_ stay?"

"Not this time," the doctor says gently. "But this will just be a quick exam and they can come right back in."

"We'll be right outside," Beckett promises.

Reluctantly, Alexis nods and lets go of Beckett's hand. Beckett and Castle step outside the room to let the doctor work.

"What happened in there?" Martha asks when she notices the looks on their faces, fear growing like a cold lump in the pit of her stomach. "Is Alexis..."

"She's fine, Martha," Beckett tries to assure her.

"In a manner of speaking," Castle sighs dejectedly. "She's not my little girl. I'm a stranger to her."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

* * *

After the doctor examines Alexis, he determines she needs more tests. Remembering how long hospital tests can take hours, Beckett heads out on an errand. By the time she returns, the doctor is just finishing explaining to Castle what he thinks is causing the confusion in Alexis. Not wanting to interrupt, she waits until the doctor leaves to approach Castle.

"What's going on with Alexis?" Beckett asks.

"Amnesia is all he can figure," Castle explains. "The swelling is less than before, but still there. The doctor is thinking maybe that's causing the memory loss. Plus, it turns out the drugs those kidnappers gave her has memory loss as a side effect. Combine those two factors with the trauma of the kidnapping itself, is it any wonder she doesn't want to remember anything?"

Beckett can sense his frustration and just wraps her arms around him.

"We'll get her through this, Castle. It's going to be all right."

"I want to believe that," he whispers. She can hear tears in his voice. "But what if she never remembers? What if I never get my little girl back?"

"You can't think like that," Beckett says, stepping back so he can look her in the eyes. "You have to stay positive. She needs you."

He rests his forehead on hers, drawing strength from her presence.

"You're right. I have to get it together," he nods, agreeing with her. "She can't see me like this, though. Can you go in with her? I need a few minutes."

"Take your time," she says, kissing his cheek. "I brought some of her things from home so she'll be more comfortable. I'm going to help her clean up a bit and get changed."

Her actions make him smile.

"You are wonderful with her," he says reverently, stroking her hair out her face. "You're going to be an amazing mother one day."

And again, the picture of them as a family gets clearer in his mind. He now can't wait to make it happen. He walks down the hall, leaving her stunned.

Not sure how to take what he just said, Beckett decides to just put it in the back of her mind for now. She picks up the overnight bag she packed for Alexis and goes into the girl's room.

"You're back!" Alexis says excitedly when she sees Beckett.

"I promised I'd be here. Here I am. And I brought you some things."

Beckett holds up the bag for her to see.

"How about we get you out of that awful hospital gown and into some pajamas of your own?"

"That would be wonderful, Mo..." Alexis sucks in a sharp breath when she realizes she almost mistakenly called Beckett 'Mom' again. "What did I call you before?"

"Detective Beckett mostly. I'm a cop," she explains when Alexis gives her a strange look. "But how about you call me Kate?"

Beckett helps Alexis get washed up and in her clean pajamas from home, then settles her back in the bed.

"Can you stay longer?" Alexis asks her with a yawn. Between the surgery, the tests, and the general confusion, the girl is exhausted.

"Of course. Your dad and I will stay here with you tonight."

"Can you tell me about him? Or you? Or anyone, really?" Alexis begs. "I feel like I don't know anything."

Beckett gets settled in the chair next to the bed and starts talking.

"Well, Castle is a writer," she starts. "He and your mom got a divorce when you were about three. Since then, it's pretty much been the two of you. Your Gram moved in a few years ago."

"Where is my mom now?" Alexis is curious.

"West coast sometimes. Paris other times. She's an actress and travels for work. That's why you live with your dad."

Alexis just frowns at that.

"She just left me? I was just a baby still."

The look on Alexis' face has Beckett realizing she's probably said something she shouldn't. Just because the old Alexis was used to and seemed to accept the situation with her mother, that doesn't mean this Alexis understands.

"I can't really say how it was back then," Beckett grimaces, hoping she hasn't done permanent damage to the girl's opinion of her own mother. "Your dad can probably explain it much better."

"Did you help my dad raise me?"

"No," Beckett smiles. "You were nearly grown by the time I met your father. Probably like 14 or 15 years old, I'd guess. That was almost five years ago. We met for a case. He helped out the NYPD then started shadowing me to get inspiration for a character in his books. We started dating about a year ago. That's our story in a nutshell."

"Well, whatever path you took, I'm glad you're here now." Alexis yawns again and snuggles into her covers.

Beckett helps tuck her in and places a kiss on her forehead.

"Sing to me again?" Alexis asks sleepily.

Finding it impossible now to say no to her, Beckett does as she asks.

* * *

Castle returns later, tipping quietly into the room when he notices his sleeping daughter and partner. He takes a minute to straighten out the covers on the bed before running his hand through her hair.

"She drifted off not too long ago," Beckett says, blinking her sleepy eyes open. "I think physically she's okay. Just still kind of confused."

"That's to be expected," Castle shrugs, seemingly more accepting of the situation than he was earlier. "You were right before. All we can do is be here for her and believe for the best. She's still my little girl, even if she doesn't remember."

"She asked about Meredith," Beckett admits warily. "That might be an issue you want to address sooner rather than later. She doesn't quite understand the … arrangement."

"Sooner is better. Meredith will be here in the morning. That means..." Castle pauses as he takes his jacket off and tosses it on the table.

"... we have a few more drama free hours to fill." He takes Beckett by the hand and pulls her over with him to the small couch across the room.

"How do you plan on filling them?" she asks with a giggle when he falls back onto the couch, pulling her so she lands on top of him.

"I think we'll figure something out," he whispers, grabbing her face to kiss her.

They kiss for long, drugging minutes, the stress of the past few days almost forgotten.

"I've missed this. I've missed you so much," he tells her between kisses, unable to get enough of her. "Promise me this is forever, Kate."

"Castle?" she gasps. She pushes herself off him and moves to sit next to him on the couch. "Are you …. is this a proposal?"

"Not quite yet," he smiles, running a finger through the creases in her crinkled forehead. "Just a warning that I'm going to be asking soon, though. I plan on keeping you, Kate Beckett. I'm never letting you go."

With one last kiss, he pulls the blanket off the back of the couch and settles it over the two of them.

"Good night," is all he says, closing his eyes for some much needed rest.

He doesn't have to imagine the look of shock that's still on her face. That should give her something to think about. Knowing Kate Beckett the way he knows Kate Beckett, it's_ all_ she's going to think about. Looks like he'll be getting his family after all.

That thought follows him into the first peaceful sleep he's had in days.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

* * *

Meredith's arrival the next day turned out to be as drama filled as Castle predicted. Coinciding with Alexis' release from the hospital, they all ended up at Castle's place. The yelling started soon after. Followed by the crying. By the time Castle convinces Meredith to go to a hotel, it's late afternoon and they're all just drained.

"That was fun," Beckett says sarcastically.

"This reminds me of the time Alexis was just about to start kindergarten and wondered why her Mommy wasn't here," Castle sighs. "I had to explain to her then, much the way I had to explain to her today, that Mommy loves her. Mommy just couldn't live with us. I hate that we have to go through this again."

"She'll come around eventually."

"No. I won't," Alexis declares stubbornly.

Beckett and Castle turn around to see the girl coming down the stairs. Martha is with her to make sure she doesn't get unsteady and fall.

"Baby, what are you doing out of bed? The doctor released you with strict instructions to rest," Castle reminds her.

"I wanted to make sure that woman was gone."

"That woman is your mother. And you need to be nice to her, Young Lady." Castle hates to get strict with her. She's just as stressed as everyone else. Even more so when you add in the confusion from the amnesia. But he can't let her continue to hate her own mother. "The situation may seem complicated to you now, but we've had years to come to terms with it."

"How can a person come to terms with the fact that her own mother doesn't want her?"

"Alexis …"

"No, Dad. No excuses for her."

"Come over here, Alexis," Beckett says gently. She holds out her hand and pulls Alexis to sit with her. "Your mother is a good person. And she does love you. She just shows it in an unconventional way."

"What do you mean?" Alexis asks dubiously. But she at least seems willing to hear Beckett out.

"I just mean that you can't put her in a box with the traditional idea of what a mother is. Just remember that she gave birth to you and she's loved you from the day you were born. And for nearly 20 years, you've loved her as well. Isn't love all that matters? Isn't it love that binds us together? Some people just show it in different ways."

"Well, maybe she can come to dinner or something. Maybe we can talk," Alexis relents.

"I think she'd like that," Beckett smiles, tucking a stray strand of hair behind Alexis' ear. "I think she'd like it even better if you called her and invited her yourself."

Alexis nods and heads back upstairs with Martha. When she's out of sight, Beckett lets out a huge sigh of relief.

"You're right. That was tough."

"But you handled it like a pro," Castle smiles, giving her a quick peck on the lips. "I told you you'd be a great mom."

"Alexis is a great kid," Beckett offers back. "That's because you're such a good dad. I see now some of the struggles you've had over the years. But you made her happy and you made sure she felt enough love to make up for an absentee mom."

"You know, our kid won't have that problem. He'll have you there," Castle grins.

"_Our_ kid?" Beckett laughs nervously. "First we're getting married and now we're having a baby?"

"Not quite yet," he repeats his sentiment from before. "Just expanding the vision. I see a beautiful life for us, Kate. And the day you see it too is the day I'm going to make it happen."

"I, uh …. I need to see what we have for dinner," she says, practically running into the kitchen to escape the uncomfortable conversation.

He just smiles after her. She's still running, but he's wearing her down. Pretty soon, marriage and babies will be all she can think about. He can't wait until she realizes she wants it as badly as he does.

* * *

Dinner was awkward at first. But Alexis began to take her cues from Castle and Beckett and soon figured out all she had to do was nod and laugh at whatever story Meredith was telling about herself. This dinner was doing nothing to dispel her theory that her mother is a selfish egotist and she can only be grateful she never had to spend much time with the woman. Once again, she finds herself wishing that Kate Beckett was her mother. She's felt nothing but selfless love from the woman since she woke up in that hospital bed.

Kate is another mystery to Alexis. It's obvious she loves the woman and that the woman loves her. The woman loves her dad and her Grams and they her. So why weren't they a family? Why wasn't Kate her mother? Stepmother, at least.

"Why aren't you and my dad married?" Alexis finds herself blurting out, cutting off whatever tale Meredith was regaling them with.

"We couldn't make it work, Sweetie," Meredith explains, thinking the question is for her.

"No," Alexis corrects, turning her gaze on Beckett. "I meant Kate and Dad."

Beckett blushes at unexpectedly being the center of attention. Alexis notices her mother glaring at the woman. Interesting.

"Well, your father hasn't asked me to marry him yet," Beckett says.

"Not technically, but give us time." Castle winks at Alexis. "I'm easing her into the idea."

Alexis smiles at them. That makes sense, she realizes. She can sense a reticence in Kate. An uncertainty at her place in this family. Alexis isn't sure how things were before her amnesia, but she's determined to make sure Kate feels like she belongs. They can be a happy family.

"I wouldn't be opposed to an autumn wedding," Alexis hints. "The fall colors would look awesome with my hair."

A still flustered Beckett doesn't know what to say to that. The silence is filled, however, with Meredith wresting the attention back on herself.

"Dinner was lovely, Kate. Coffee and dessert now?"

"Sure, I'll just get it," Beckett says, smiling politely.

"I'll help," Alexis offers.

"No, Sweetie. I need you to come with me," Meredith all but orders her. "I wanted to show you some old pictures and videos. Let's all go in your father's office and use his computer. I'm sure Kate can handle dessert and coffee on her own."

"Of course. I can handle anything, Meredith."

Sensing the tension between the women, Alexis does as her mother asks and heads into the office. Castle and Martha follow.

When Meredith and Beckett are alone, Meredith doesn't waste any time speaking her mind.

"What do you expect to accomplish here? You're not stealing my daughter from me."

"What are you talking about, Meredith?"

Beckett moves into the kitchen and pulls the cake out of the refrigerator. She grabs some small plates from the cabinet and starts placing cake slices on each.

"I'm talking about this. You being here. Playing house with my daughter and my husband."

"Ex-husband, Meredith. You and Castle divorced years ago."

"And you think it's over?" Meredith throws her head back and laughs "It's never going to be over with us, Kate. It's best you realize that now. We have history and a child. Do you think either Richard or Alexis will appreciate your attempts to alienate me from my own child?"

"I haven't ..."

"It doesn't matter what you have or haven't done," Meredith cuts her off. "Richard and I have an understanding about this. None of his playthings get to play Mommy to my child."

"I'm more than a plaything," Beckett spits out angrily.

"Gina thought so, too," Meredith grins smugly. "But he never let her get close to Alexis. It's going to be the same for you. I'll turn on the tears. I'll lie if I have to. But Alexis is mine and she's going to stay that way."

Beckett considers fighting back. But she knows what Meredith is saying has some merit. Things could get ugly if she pushes it. And ugly is the last thing Alexis needs right now. So Beckett makes the best decision she can.

"Can you let them know something came up? That I had to go?" she quietly requests, accepting defeat.

"Of course."

The smile on Meredith's face chills her. And Beckett can't help but think she's abandoning Alexis to a viper. She can only hope the girl will be okay.

* * *

"Where's Kate?" Castle asks Meredith when she returns carrying a tray of coffee and dessert and wearing a smile that scares him a little.

"She claims something came up," Meredith shrugs innocently. "I think she was just bored. Family life might not be for her. So, let's check out these videos."

Castle looks over at Alexis and can't help but notice the dejected look on her face. He hurts for her. He wants to shake Kate Beckett for putting that look on her face. But instead, he takes his coffee from Meredith and pretends nothing is wrong. But the nutmeg only Meredith knows to add turns his stomach. He thought Beckett was warming to the idea of joining his family, but maybe not. And unfortunately, he can't think of any more ways to convince her. With a sigh, he starts the old home movies and wonders if he should even try anymore.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: I feel your pain. I'm trying to get rid of Meredith, but I think she's having too much fun ;-)

Chapter 6

* * *

Beckett didn't sleep well that night. She tossed and turned worrying about what Alexis would think. She didn't even say good-bye to the girl. And she doubts seriously Meredith delivered an accurate message.

The next morning, Beckett is up before her alarm and soon finds herself at Castle's. She lets herself in with her key and isn't surprised to see a moping Alexis eating breakfast.

"Hi," Beckett says tentatively. "You're up early."

"Didn't sleep well."

Beckett is taken aback by the bite in her tone.

"I'm sorry I left last night," she apologizes. "I should have told you I was going."

"No, you should have just admitted we were boring you and you couldn't be bothered with me anymore."

Alexis is practically in tears and that brings tears to Beckett's eyes.

"It wasn't like that," Beckett swears. "I just wanted to give you and your family some time. Your mother ..."

"That woman is no kind of mother to me."

Beckett has nothing to say to that. Because she agrees with Alexis. Meredith has spent the past fifteen years breezing into and out of Alexis' life. She's been the fun, crazy aunt. But never a mother. Beckett can hardly blame the girl for feeling that way. At the same time, how can Beckett judge Meredith? She's nobody's mother. She knows nothing about being a mother. Her own mother has been gone for so long.

"Alexis, I was about your age when I lost my mother. I would give anything to have her back. I would give anything to have a mother. Don't be so quick to put off the one you have."

Guilt colors Alexis' face.

"I sound like a brat, don't I?" she realizes. "I'm sorry about your mom, Kate. What happened to her?"

"She was a lawyer and got mixed up with something someone didn't want her involved in. So they killed her. I became a cop to find out who did it and to make them pay."

"Have you?"

"Sort of," Beckett shrugs. "For so long I hid behind that mission. Meeting your father helped me see that there's more to life than avenging my mother's death. But meeting you has made me want to be the kind of mother my mother was."

"You want to be a mother to me?" Alexis asks hopefully.

"I wouldn't mind trying," Beckett smiles, placing her palm on the girl's face. "Before, you didn't seem interested. But things are different now. We had a fresh start when you woke up with no memories of the past. You seemed to finally need and want me."

"I don't know what happened with us in the past, I just know that right now, I couldn't have picked a better mother than you. I'm glad you were the one sitting by my bed when I woke up, Kate."

With a shy smile, Alexis wraps her arms around the woman. It almost brings tears to Kate's eyes, but she manages to hold them back.

"I'm glad too, Sweetheart," Beckett smiles. "Why don't you go up and get dressed. Maybe we can go out and do something fun today."

Alexis puts her cereal bowl in the sink and goes up to her room. A few seconds later, Castle comes out of his room.

"You know, I planned on having it out with you this morning, Detective Beckett."

Beckett pauses in her coffee making to give him a confused look.

"You hurt her last night," he explains. "We look up and you're gone. No word, no explanation. Nothing. Just gone. You deserted her."

"You're right," she confesses. "But that wasn't my intention. I was trying to do right by her. But I ended up hurting her. That's why I came early this morning. To apologize."

"Why did you leave?" he wonders, taking the cup of coffee she offers him.

"She seems to be having some trouble connecting with Meredith. I just thought things would go smoother without me here," Beckett claims, unwilling to tell Castle the real reason she left.

"However," she interrupts him before he can say anything. "It's on me that I didn't at least tell her I was leaving. I didn't realize she would care."

That sucks the wind out of his sails. He was ready to give her grief over leaving and hurting Alexis when she's the one who needs reassuring too.

"You just don't get it, do you?" he asks, gently grabbing her face, pulling her for a kiss. "I love you, Kate. You are a part of my family now. Why do you doubt this?"

"I don't know," she shrugs, resting her forehead against his. "I guess sometimes it seems too good to be true. Other times, it's still scary to me."

"We don't bite," he whispers, kissing her again. "Well, I might on occasion."

That makes her laugh, lightening her mood just like he wanted. She's too beautiful to have such fear and doubt in her eyes.

"Ahem," Alexis clears her throat behind them. "Ready to go, Kate?"

Beckett blushes when Castle pulls her in for one more kiss.

"Where are you two headed?" he asks when he finally releases her.

"Just taking her around to some familiar places," Beckett explains as she gathers her bag and jacket. "We're going to see if anything jogs her memory. Then we're meeting up with Martha for lunch."

"A girl's day!" Alexis cheerfully says.

Her smile makes Castle smile. She may have been upset about Beckett leaving last night, but it appears the two women have made up. He has nothing to worry about.

* * *

A few hours later, he isn't sure that's the case any longer. He's just finishing up with his latest submission to his publisher when the doorbell rings.

"Meredith?"

"Where's my darling girl?" Meredith asks, breezing in uninvited. "I brought breakfast for us to enjoy."

"But it's noon. It's a little late for breakfast," Castle points out. "She's been up and out of here for hours now."

"Well, it's breakfast time in Hollywood. Work with me, Richard," she scolds. "And what do you mean she's gone? The girl just got out of the hospital. Why is she going anywhere?"

"She'll be fine," Castle assures her. "Beckett took her out. She won't let anything happen to her. That woman is more sensible than anyone ought to be."

Castle takes the bag of food from Meredith and starts rooting around inside. He finds a muffins and breaks off the top to eat.

"And was this impromptu outing planned? Of course not," she says before he can answer her. "That woman did this on purpose. She's trying to undermine me."

"What are you talking about, Meredith?" he asks, suddenly exasperated with his first ex-wife. "Undermine you in what way?"

"Isn't it obvious? Kate Beckett is trying to steal what's mine! First you, now Alexis."

"Come on," Castle rolls his eyes. "First off, I'm not yours. Secondly, in what way is she trying to 'steal' Alexis? Alexis is your daughter. No one is taking her from you."

Meredith does what she does best. She cries and she lies. Kate Beckett was warned. This is war now.

"For one thing, she knew I had plans with Alexis today. I wanted to surprise her. But it looks like the surprise is on me," Meredith sniffles, wiping away crocodile tears.

"No way," Castle refuses to believe. "How would Beckett even know about your plans if they were a surprise?"

"Because I told her about them," Meredith claims. "Right before she left here last night. That's what we were talking about while I helped her get dessert together."

Meredith peeks out the corner of her eye to see if he's believing her story. She can't go too crazy so that he won't believe her at all. But she has to pour on just enough to make him feel sorry for her.

"Listen, Richard. I understand I haven't been the best mother to Alexis over the years. I know I haven't always been there for her. But when it matters, haven't I shown up? When she had mono earlier this year, didn't I show up? And what did Kate try to do? She tried to put me out of YOUR apartment. She didn't even want me here taking care of our daughter."

"It wasn't like that," Castle says. But he starts to wonder.

"And why did Alexis have an attitude with me from the moment I arrived a few days ago? It's like someone told her lies about me, making me seem like the worst mother ever."

Castle remembers Beckett mentioning to him she told Alexis about the unusual arrangement they had with Meredith. But she never said exactly what she told Alexis about her mother. He decides not to divulge that tidbit to Meredith. But that too makes him wonder.

"I think I see what you're saying. But I'm sure it's all just a misunderstanding," Castle tries to calm her. "Let me talk to Beckett and we'll clear this up."

"I just don't want to lose my little girl," Meredith concludes, dabbing her weepy eyes with a handkerchief.

"You won't," Castle promises, pulling her in for a hug. "I'll take care of it.

The smile goes unseen by Castle, but it's a smile of victory. This turned out to be even easier than getting rid of Gina, she muses. She imagines Kate Beckett will be out of their lives by dinner time.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Thanks SO much for all the feedback. You guys are awesome and are really keeping me going on this. I just want to make you all happy :-)

Chapter 7

* * *

The saying is true. Beckett's face actually hurts. She's never laughed so hard in her life. She had such a good time with Martha and Alexis, more fun than she expected to have. She wanted to make the day special for Alexis. But it ended up being more special for her.

As much as she loves Castle, there was always something keeping her from fully committing to him. She knew she was holding back, but she wasn't entirely sure why or how to get past it. She realized today that Alexis and Martha were holding her back. Not purposely, of course. But Kate realized she had barriers up with both of them. She was afraid to let Martha into her heart, fearing the relationship with the woman would push aside what she used to have with her own mother. But she was wrong. Being with Martha made her see that she can consider the woman a mother figure without replacing Johanna Beckett's place in her heart. Johanna started the job and Martha is more than willing to take up the reins and continue. For the first time in years, Beckett is allowing herself to enjoy a mother's love.

She's also allowing herself to be a mother. Alexis is simply ... amazing. It's the only word Beckett can use to describe her. She has fallen utterly and completely in love with her. After her mistake last night leaving the girl, she swore to herself to just let go of all her fears and just love her. Opening up herself to give love, and receive it in return, makes her see that Castle was right. They really have become a family. And she is a part of it. The only person keeping her on the outside was herself. But no more. She has to let Castle know that she's ready for it all. She smiles to herself, wondering how he'd take to the idea of eloping.

"What's so funny?" Alexis asks, using her key to let them inside their home.

"Can you keep a secret?"

"Of course," Alexis whispers gleefully. "What is it?"

"You know that autumn wedding you talked about? I think it's gonna happen a lot sooner than that," Beckett smiles. "Today was the best day ever. You and Martha ... you two made me feel like a part of this family. Like you really love me."

"We do," Alexis says, hugging her. "So much. I'm just glad you finally see that."

"I'm so happy," Beckett sighs. "I mean, I'm finally completely happy and I have you all to thank. Being with you all feels right. Being with your father … completes me. I know that sounds corny, but I don't know how else to explain it."

"It's so sweet and so romantic."

The two giggle and don't hear Castle coming out of his office to join them.

"What's sweet and romantic?" he asks, curious.

"Just you two lovebirds." Alexis rises to give her father a kiss on the cheek. "I'm going to leave you to talk."

She tosses a wink over her shoulder at Beckett and goes up to her room.

"She's in a good mood," Castle notes. "I take it you had a good day?"

"The best," Beckett smiles, leaning over to kiss Castle, but stopping in her tracks when he turns his face away.

"Was it worth it?"

Now she's confused.

"Was what worth it?" She takes a good look at Castle and is shocked to see him looking ... annoyed, she supposes is the best word to describe it. "Castle, what's going on?"

"Meredith came by today, after you and Alexis left."

"Okay," Beckett says when Castle just pauses and stares at her. "And I guess you told her I had taken Alexis out. Is she coming by later for dinner or should we see if Alexis is up for going over to her hotel?"

"You know why she came by. She came by to have breakfast with Alexis, just like she planned."

"I didn't realize," Beckett shrugs. "So I guess we should try to take Alexis to her tonight so that Meredith won't have to bother with coming over here twice in one day."

Castle just continues to stare at her.

"Castle, what? Just tell me what's going on. You're starting to scare me."

"Meredith says she told you she was coming to have breakfast with Alexis. And that you took Alexis out on purpose to keep her from Meredith."

Beckett's mouth drops open in shock. Actually, it's not even shock. Meredith warned her she'd lie if she had to. And it looks like Castle bought into it hook, line, and sinker. So no, the lie is not the surprise. The fact that Castle is sitting here interrogating her, accusing her, is the surprise.

"You believe her!" Beckett gasps incredulously. "You think I'm trying to, what? Sabotage their relationship? Why would I do that?"

"I don't know, Kate. I'm just trying to get to the bottom of this," he says.

"Maybe what you should get to the bottom of is why you'd believe I'd do what she's accusing me of!"

"You haven't denied it!" he yells back at her.

"I didn't think I'd need to! You talk this big game about making me a part of this family, but it's all talk, Castle. When it comes down to someone mattering to YOUR daughter, the game changes. I love her, okay? And she loves me. Deal with it. You can't make me want this family, and then box me out when I get too close."

"Kate, that's not ..."

"You can't give me this daughter to love and to treasure, and then tell me she can't be mine! If I'm going to be in this, I'm in all the way. Think of that before you talk marriage and family to me again. You thought I wasn't ready? No, Castle. It's you who needs to be willing to give all or nothing."

Beckett storms towards the door and opens it, intent on leaving. But she remembers the child she just claimed as her own upstairs expecting her to be there. She mutters a curse as she stops in her tracks.

"I can't leave her again," Beckett says, more to herself than anyone else. "Not like this."

Scowling at Castle, she digs out her cell phone and calls the precinct.

"Esposito."

"Hey, Espo. Do me a favor and tell me you guys need me," she begs, barely holding back her rage at Castle.

"You're in luck. We actually could use your help. We had a body drop this morning. You can meet us at the morgue. Lanie's got him on the table now."

"Great, I'll see you there."

She hangs up and puts the phone back into her pocket. She gives Castle a scathing look before stomping upstairs to see Alexis. She pauses at the door and takes a moment to put on a blank face so the girl won't know anything is wrong.

"Bad news, Alexis. I have to go to work," she says to the girl, moving into the room to sit next to her on the bed. "I just talked to one of my partners and they can use my help."

"You're leaving?"

"For a little bit," Beckett nods. "Don't wait up, though. I'll see you for breakfast in the morning."

"Oh," Alexis sighs, sensing there's more to the story than Beckett is saying. "Is it me? Did I bore you again? I tried to be fun and interesting. I thought we had a good time today."

"Bore me? Of course not. I had the best time with you today. I meant it when I said that."

"Then is it my mom? You always seem to go missing when she comes around," Alexis guesses. "Come to think of it, she's the one who told us you got bored and left last night. That wasn't true, was it?"

Beckett bites back the truth she wants to tell Alexis and tries to come up with the diplomatic answer.

"Alexis, your mother is ... afraid," she finally says after a moment to deliberate. "She's just trying to do whatever it takes to get her little girl back. You really should try harder with that. Believe me. When you get your memory back, you're going to feel bad for not giving her a chance. You really do love her."

"How can you say that? I feel nothing for her, but you say I loved her. I love you more than anything right now, but you say we didn't really connect."

"Come here." Beckett pulls Alexis into a hug. "Nothing is going to take away how I feel about you. But it would kill me if when you got your memory back, you regretted the time we spent together. Especially if it comes at the expense of time you could be spending with your own mother. Imagine the situations were reversed and I was Meredith. Would you want me feeling like you didn't care?"

"Are you always right?" Alexis asks her, realizing she has a point.

"Usually," Beckett smiles. "But especially in this case."

"Fine, dinner with my mom. And I'll try to enjoy it."

"That's all I ask."

Beckett leaves her and goes back downstairs. She walks past Castle on the couch without a word.

"Beckett, wait."

She turns and stares at him, her disappointment clear on her face.

"I have to go, Castle."

She leaves him there stunned, wondering how in the world things got so bad between them.

* * *

" ... and even after all that, I got the part. But I turned it down because by then, I was over it, you know?"

Meredith lets out a hearty laugh, not realizing she's laughing alone. Her plan to keep Kate Beckett away obviously worked because the woman was not there. And no one mentioned her absence. Meredith doesn't care where the woman is, though. So long as she has Richard and Alexis to herself, that's all that matters. She figures now is as good a time as any to further press her agenda.

"Alexis, Baby. How would you like coming out to California with me this summer?"

That particular bombshell doesn't land very easily. Castle and Alexis both look up sharply at her and stare in shock.

"Where is this coming from?" Castle asks. "She's never spent the entire summer with you before."

"Well, she's older now and can make her own choices. I just figured now might be a good time for her to spend some time with me. Maybe this amnesia is a sign for her to make a big change in her life. She can come with me and hit all the Hollywood parties with me. Maybe try her hand at some acting. It'll be so much fun, don't you think Alexis?"

Alexis, still in shock, just looks to Castle for help.

"She's already signed up for the summer semester at school. She had to withdraw this semester and is using the summer to stay on track," Castle explains.

Most of it's true. He and Alexis discussed that option on the way back from Paris after the kidnapping, but haven't officially taken those steps. But Meredith doesn't need to know that.

"Oh, pooh. You and school," Meredith frowns. "Aren't you tired of all those books and tests and teachers and ..."

"Learning?" Alexis adds sarcastically.

"Exactly!" Meredith practically squeals, thinking Alexis understands her. "It's time you let loose and have some fun."

"She's insane," Alexis says, turning to Castle.

"Alexis! What a horrible thing for a daughter to say to her own mother!" Meredith gasps, before jumping up and running off crying. They hear the bathroom door slam shut and Meredith's sobs echoing over the sound of running water.

"I just can't with her. I know I promised Kate, but ..."

"Wait a second. What did you promise Kate?" Castle asks.

"Ever since I woke up, she's been trying to convince me to give my mom a chance," Alexis says. "She swears Meredith loves me and that we had an unconventional relationship. But I can't see that. All I see is that she's selfish and fake and I can't stand being around her!"

"That sounds about right," Castle nods.

"Wait, what?"

"That's about how you've always felt about her," Castle confirms. "Beckett was right. Your mother loves you. But lets face it, she would breeze into town for a few crazy days, we'd pretend to have fun with her, and she'd leave just when we were about to go nuts. You said to me once that you loved her, but didn't want to be around her."

"And that was okay?" Alexis asks incredulously.

"It worked for us," Castle shrugs. "I thought you were okay with the situation, but maybe deep inside, you weren't. Maybe all these years, you were looking for a mother. And maybe now, you've found one in Kate."

"She is pretty terrific," Alexis says, smiling for the first time that evening. "She loves us, Dad."

"Yeah, Baby," he hugs her. "She does."

Or she did, he thinks to himself. But he messed up big time with her. He has to figure out a way to make it right.

Right then, Meredith lets out a loud noise that can only be described as a caterwaul.

No, first, he needs to gets rid of the shrieking woman in his bathroom. Then he can find Beckett and crawl on broken glass if needed to make up with her.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N - Going out of town in a bit, so I'm posting the last 2 chapters tonight. Sorry to say, but this is winding to a close. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Chapter 8

* * *

She's almost disappointed at how quickly they solve the case. She now has no excuse for not going back to Castle's.

"What's going on with you, Girl? You look like you're in a funky mood," Lanie asks.

Beckett doesn't even know where to begin. So she starts with what she sees as the root of her problems.

"Meredith," is all she says.

"Ahh, the Deep Fried Twinkie returns," Lanie shakes her head. "Didn't I tell you last time to handle your business with her? I bet you're regretting not listening to me."

"I listened … sort of," Beckett insists. "We had that nice dinner the last time she was in town and I thought we'd come to an understanding. Apparently not. Apparently, Meredith still considers Castle hers and has no problems driving away who she sees as serious competition."

Lanie continues to shake her head.

"I saw this coming a mile away. You can't let skanks like that anywhere near your man."

"She is Alexis' mother," Beckett reminds her.

"Please," Lanie huffs. "That woman has the maternal instincts of a … one of those fish who eats her eggs after she lays them."

"That's disgusting, Lanie," Beckett smiles, grateful to her best friend for lightening her mood. "But kind of accurate in this case."

Beckett walks over to the cold storage where she knows Lanie stores the really good beer. She grabs a bottle for herself and passes one to Lanie.

"But again, she is Alexis' mother. And Alexis adores her normally. I just don't want Alexis to get her memory back and only remember how I constantly trashed her mother to her. I _want_ her to try to bond again with Meredith. Despite what Meredith is trying to make Castle believe."

"Castle knows better."

"You'd think he would. But no," Beckett says, rolling her eyes. "That man is so infuriating. I swear, I feel like strangling him sometimes."

"Wait, he believes her?" Lanie asks incredulously. "He actually thinks you're trying to sabotage Meredith's attempts to reach Alexis?"

"Apparently." Beckett takes a long pull at her beer, nearly finishing the bottle. She briefly considers another one, but stops herself. Alcohol only makes things worse in her family. She won't use it as a pain blocker.

"Rick Castle is an idiot. But unfortunately, he's been that woman's victim since they met. For 20 years, she's been manipulating him, Kate. I mean, what other man divorces his wife, takes the kid, and still generously supports the ex financially?"

"So you're saying if Castle and I ever divorce, I'm set for life?" Beckett says jokingly.

"Divorce? Uh, excuse me? You two have plans to marry in the first place?"

"Lanie, before this disastrous afternoon, I was seriously considering dragging that man to the nearest justice of the peace," she admits. "I had the best morning with Alexis and Martha. I finally felt like everything clicked into place for me. I wanted nothing more than to marry him and get my 'happily ever after'. Then he starts in on me about Alexis and Meredith. I was so mad I couldn't even speak to him. I just left and came to work."

"You escaped," Lanie corrects her.

"I took a small time out," Beckett clarifies. "I needed to think."

"This is what you need to think about," Lanie tells her, suddenly serious. "Think about how you felt this afternoon before your bubble burst. Think about how you had your 'happily ever after' right there in front of you. Now think about if you want to give Meredith the satisfaction of taking that away from you."

"You're right," Beckett nods. "That's my family. We worked hard to get there. I'm not giving them up because of Meredith."

"That's my girl! Now you go and kick that little skinny redhead's butt all the way back to Hollywood or wherever her snake pit is located. I can come with you if you want. You know I got your back."

"I'm good," Beckett laughs. "I got this."

She gives Lanie a hug of thanks before leaving the morgue.

* * *

"She's been at that for half an hour," Alexis moans, holding onto her head. "She's giving me a headache. You've got to stop her, Dad."

As if on cue, Meredith's crying jag escalates again, the noise causing both Alexis and Castle to cringe.

"Baby, I've tried. She won't stop."

The front door slams open at that moment, a frantic looking Beckett standing there with her gun.

"What is that noise? Who's dying?" she asks after a quick visual verifies her loved ones are safe. She puts her gun back in its holster. "I heard it all the way down the hall."

"Kate!" Alexis runs to her, throwing her arms around her. "I'm so glad you're here."

Beckett can't help but smile as she returns the hug. She doesn't think she'll ever get used to this greeting from Alexis. It warms her heart and thaws the anger she was feeling at Castle even more than Lanie's little pep talk.

"Hey," Castle says hesitantly. "I'm glad you came back tonight too."

"Well, I promised Alexis I'd be back." She gives the girl another squeeze. "Sounds like I'm just in time, though. What in the world is going on in here?"

"Meredith's putting on a show for us," Castle sighs heavily. "She took offense at Alexis accurately calling her 'insane' and locked herself in the bathroom. She's been in there carrying on for awhile now."

"My head is killing me," Alexis groans.

"You won't have to worry about her for much longer," Beckett promises her. "Run up and pack a bag. I'm getting you out of here and away from her if that's what you want."

"More than anything," Alexis sighs in relief.

Beckett looks at Castle, daring him to defy her. But he doesn't. After Alexis is upstairs and out of earshot, Beckett turns back to Castle.

"It's like this. Either Meredith goes or Alexis and I go. Either way, Alexis is getting away from that woman tonight. I've let this go on for far too long."

"You'd take my daughter and leave?" he asks.

"I'd take _my_ daughter and leave," she counters. "I told you. You gave her to me. I'm not giving her up without a fight."

"And here you are, fighting _for_ her."

He catches her off guard with a quick, crushing kiss.

"Is it any wonder why I love you?" he says, smiling at her. He leans down to kiss her again, but she pushes him away.

"Hold on, Castle. There's still the matter of our fight earlier today."

"Let me say this first … I'm sorry," he apologizes.

"For?"

"For, uh …. what happened today," he fumbles. "When I made you mad. Yes, that's it. I'm sorry for making you mad."

He grins, thinking he's figured it out. But she just stares at him, waiting on him to get to the right point. She's not giving him an out on this. His grin falls when he realizes he needs to give her more.

"And, uh … I'm sorry because …. of Meredith?" he tries.

"Are you asking me or telling me?" she sighs impatiently.

"Telling you?"

"Castle! You have no clue, do you? You don't even know why you're apologizing," she says, sounding suddenly very tired.

"I know that I hurt you today," he starts again. "I know that I let Meredith tell me a story that made me think the worst of you. And it's partly because of what you said earlier. For so long, Alexis and I were everything to each other. I put up with Meredith being the way she is because that meant Alexis was all mine. I'm not used to sharing her. But now, Alexis is this new person. And it's you she needs. Not me. And I guess I was looking for a reason to keep her all to myself. Meredith gave me an excuse."

He takes her hand and places it over his heart.

"But I know you, Kate Beckett. I know that whatever happened today, whether Meredith lied or told the truth, you did whatever you did because it was best for Alexis. I can't get mad at that. I can't get mad at you putting her first, no matter what the consequences are for you. I didn't completely trust you before and I am so sorry for that. But I'm trusting you now. If you say Meredith goes, then she goes."

"Castle," she sighs. "You … ugh! You and your words make it impossible for a person to stay mad at you."

"Then don't." He pulls her closer. "Forgive me?"

"Always," she promises.

She seals the promise with a kiss.

* * *

Ten minutes later, Castle and Alexis leave to go to Beckett's while she stays to deal with the Meredith situation. She isn't sure what she's going to have to say or do and doesn't want Alexis around for it. She takes out her gun, and sets it on her lap, waiting for the woman to realize her audience is now gone.

It doesn't take long for Meredith to notice the silence in the apartment. From where she's sitting, Beckett watches her crack open the door and peer around at the seemingly empty room.

"They left?" she asks out loud, not expecting an answer. But she gets one.

"They left few minutes ago." Beckett responds. "But I'm here. And we're going to sit down, the two of us, and have a nice little talk."


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

* * *

Beckett points her gun at Meredith and motions with it for her to sit on the seat across from her.

"What's going on here?" Meredith asks, her eye on the gun. She slowly finds her seat, not wanting to make any sudden moves and risk getting shot.

"Oh, I think you know perfectly well what's going on here," Beckett grins coldly. "You started this game. But I'm the one who's going to finish it."

"Finish it how? By killing me?" All the screaming has left Meredith's voice hoarse. Her words come out in barely a whisper.

"Kill you? What makes you say that? No, this gun is merely to convince you to cooperate with me."

"What do you want me to do?"

"That's easy …. leave. And don't come back," Beckett commands.

"See, I told Richard you were trying to sabotage me," Meredith claims victoriously, jumping up out of her seat and pointing a finger at Kate. "When he finds out, he's going to leave you."

Beckett trains the gun on her, making her sit back down.

"You can tell him whatever you want," Beckett shrugs. "It doesn't matter. He trusts me. He trusts me with his heart. And he trusts me with Alexis. That is something you will never be able to manipulate out of him. Face it, Meredith. Whatever little game you've been playing here, it's over."

"I'm not playing any games. I'm here because my daughter is sick and needs me."

"No she doesn't," Beckett contradicts her. "Your daughter has been well taken care of her entire life, no thanks to you. Right now, you're hurting her more than helping her. You've blamed me for the distance between the two of you, but you need to look at yourself and see the truth."

That stops Meredith short. She gets a confused look on her face and Beckett can see that she's actually thinking.

"Have I really been hurting her?"

"Yes," Beckett tells her straight. She sees no need to sugar coat anything.

"Does she want me gone?" Meredith asks, afraid of what the answer will be.

This time Beckett manages to scrape up some sympathy for the woman.

"She needs space right now, Meredith. She needs stability. Castle and I make up the family she knows. You being here is confusing her. She doesn't know how to deal with your, uh … unorthodox parenting style."

"Fine," she says after a few silent moments. "I'll go. But only if you promise I'll know the second she gets her memory back and is ready to see me."

"I promise she'll call," Beckett nods. "Now, I need your word on something."

"I'm not really in a position to decline, now am I?"

"Good. Then we're both on the same page." Beckett's cold smile returns. "What I want from you is for you to remember this moment, Meredith. Remember my gun pointing at you when you get it in your head to try to take my family again. Next time, I won't be quite as nice. Next time, you might not leave here intact. Have I made myself clear?"

Meredith's faith goes white at the warning.

"I see you understand perfectly." Beckett looks at her watch. "I think we're done here. And it looks as if you have just enough time to get back to your hotel, pack, and make your plane home. Castle was nice enough to book you a one way ticket. It's at the airport waiting on you. There are a couple of officers waiting out front to make sure you have no trouble making your flight."

"You thought of everything," Meredith manages to say. She stands to leave. "Well played, Detective Beckett."

Seeing she has no moves left, Meredith concedes the game.

"It seems that you have won."

With one last nod, she walks out the door.

Beckett lets out a huge sigh of relief once she's gone. It's finally over.

* * *

He's napping on the couch when she gets to her apartment. She wakes him with a kiss.

"Where's Alexis?" she asks him.

"In the guest bedroom. Her head was still hurting when we got here, so I just sent her to bed." He stretches and lets out a yawn. "How did it go with Meredith?"

"She's gone."

"That's all that matters," he says with a smile.

"That's it? You don't want to know what I said to her to make her leave town and leave Alexis alone?"

"Did it involve your gun?" he asks, shooting her a deliberately slimy leer. "You know how turned on I get when you use your gun."

"You're crazy," she laughs, pushing him lightly in the chest.

"Crazy about you," he whispers, pulling her in for a kiss. "I told you before, I trust you with Alexis. I trust the decisions you make for her, no questions asked. And I seem to recall a very smart woman reminding me that if we're going to be a family, I'm going to have to let her in … all the way."

"All or nothing," Beckett smiles.

"All or nothing," he whispers back to her, placing kisses on her face. "For now and forever."

"Always," she nods.

"Always," he promises.

She wraps her arms around him.

"So, now are you proposing?"

"Not quite yet," he reaches down to unbutton her shirt. "We haven't quite finished making up from our fight today."

He pushes the shirt off one of her shoulders and begins lining kisses there.

"Richard Castle," she gasps, partly from feigned indignation, partly from the jolt of arousal shooting through her system. "What kind of girl do you take me for?"

He silences her with a kiss that makes her lose all thought. They stumble into her bedroom where the rest of her clothes completely disappears from her body. They somehow make it to the bed where they continue to "make up" the rest of the night.

* * *

The smell of food cooking wakes them the next morning. Castle blinks his eyes open and smiles at the sight of the sun shining through the blinds and hitting the ring he managed to finally get on her finger some time between round three and round four of their "making up" session.

"So, you really said yes," he grins, kissing the hand with the sparkling engagement ring.

"You finally asked," she shrugs. "What else could I say?"

She leans over to give him one more kiss that nearly turns into something more. She pushes him away and looks at her new jewelry.

"I can't believe you've been carrying this ring around with you. How long have you had it?"

"Awhile," is all he says, his cheeks suddenly blushing.

"Well, I love it," she says, deciding not to push. "And I love you."

They're about to kiss again when her stomach noisily growls, making them both laugh instead.

"How about we get that monster fed and then tell Alexis the good news?" Castle suggests.

They pull on robes and walk out to the kitchen where Alexis has laid out the breakfast she'd been making them.

"Good morning!" she greets cheerfully, her smile growing even bigger when she notes the ring.

"What do you think?" Beckett asks, holding her hand out for Alexis to get a closer look. Beckett gets nervous when she sees tears fill the girl's eyes.

"It's beautiful," Alexis nods. "I'm so happy for you. Congratulations."

She movies from behind the counter to give them both hugs.

"This deserves a celebration. I hope the pancakes I made are good enough for such a special occasion," Alexis says, grabbing plates from the cabinet. "I don't think Kate has the ingredients to make those smorelets Dad enjoys."

Alexis sets the plates on the counter then pulls open a drawer for some forks. She looks up and notices Castle and Beckett have gone silent. And that they're just staring at her.

"How do you know about smorelets?" Castle asks her, a grin growing on his face. "Are you starting to remember? This is amazing!"

"Yeah, about that," she grimaces, biting her lip to avoid talking for as long as possible. "I may have exaggerated a teeny bit what I did and didn't remember."

"You were faking?" Beckett asks, her eyes widening in shock.

"No! I really didn't remember anything when I woke up in the hospital," Alexis insists. "But memories started drifting back just before Mom came to dinner last night. So I did fake with her, I'll admit."

"Why, Baby?" Castle wonders. "I mean, I completely understand why you wouldn't want Meredith to know yet about you having your memory back. But you could have told me once we got here."

"I was afraid Kate would leave if she didn't think I needed her anymore," Alexis admits, dropping her head so they won't see her shame. "I'm no better than my mother. Manipulation must be in the blood."

"Alexis, look at me," Beckett says, walking to the girl to stand right in front of her. She waits until Alexis looks up and wipes away the tear dripping down her cheek. "I'm not going anywhere. I love your father too much to leave. But I love you, too. And your Gram. I'm afraid the three of you are stuck with me."

"That works for me." Alexis buries her face in Beckett's chest, not wanting to let the woman go.

"No more lying, though," Beckett demands. "You want something from me, you just come to me and ask me. We can talk about it."

"Well, there is one thing I want," Alexis says with a grin, looking over to her father. "It's something I've been wanting for Christmas every year since I was six."

Castle, catching on to her hints, matches her grin with one of his own.

"This Christmas probably won't work," Castle smiles, wiggling her eyebrows at Beckett. "But we can shoot for next Christmas."

"What are we shooting for?" Beckett asks warily, feeling suddenly uncomfortable at the way Alexis and Castle are looking at her.

"A baby brother," Alexis says excitedly.

"Ba-baby?" Beckett looks at Castle in horror. "Castle, no."

"But it's a Christmas wish. How can we say no?"

She assesses him for a moment, then takes off running into the living room. But she doesn't try very hard to get away. She's laughing by the time he catches her.

"Castle!" Beckett screams when she suddenly finds herself flung over his shoulder. "What are you doing?"

"We have to start working on that Christmas gift for Alexis. Or at least start practicing," he laughs as he carries her into the bedroom and closes the door.

"Aww," Alexis coos, smiling at the thought of them being so happy. Locking themselves away to spend the day …

"Oh, ewww!" she exclaims when she realizes what they're going to be doing. She can be happy for them, but she doesn't have to think about it.

She scribbles them a note, grabs her purse and heads out to give them their privacy. Life is suddenly very, very good. It's time she got back to living hers.

THE END.

* * *

A/N - Many thanks for taking this journey with me. Thanks for all the feedback and encouragement. Hope to see you again real soon.


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